Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Movie-Gift Ideas

"Whats good America" - Berine Mac
This is my debut piece, its been cookin in the oven for the longest while, so much so it got burnt.
I know its the Holiday season and all, so i thought of some dope movie gifts you can find at your local Wal-Mart in the $5 bin, or at your blockbuster in the 5 for 20 promo, so go out and get them.

1. I Now Pronounce You Steve and Cuttino-

Review - This was a tear wrencher. The movie was about a young gay basketball playing couple that met while both playing for the Houston Havoc of the ABA. You may be farmilar with the story. Anyway, they both get traded together to the Orlando Orange Men. They then get seperated, and both bounce around the league for a while, until Steve returns to the Havoc. The best part is when Cuttino is in the bathroom singing 'If i were a boy'. Also i enjoyed the climax when they learn Cuttino has heart issues and has to retire. I would give away the ending but that would be wrong. See it yourself.

2. From Sheldon to Candice-

Review- It basically stole the plot from Beauty and the Beast, the god dam singing candle is even in it.

Buy it for the relative you think doubles as a bank robber or something.

look its the singing bastard himself.

3. 7 Crazy Starters-

---------------Spolier Alert--------------------------------

Review/Plot- This one is for all those who like a happy ending. Basically, local trouble maker Micheal Curry gets to coach a basketball team. After almost getting fired, Mr. Nice Guy (played by Allen Iverson) steps in. Mr. Nice Guy is a crazy old man who wants to win a championship ring. Knowing that this is his last chance to actually do shit, before ending up like Gary Payton just dick ridding super stars to a ring and being a shadow of your former self. So Micheal already had a solid idea of what he wanted, but after his tralior gets burned down, he decides that he is just gonna use 7 dudes constantly, let everybody else rot on the bench and fight for minutes. So he starts to make progress, then shows his true colors as a dumbass, and in the end, Mr. Nice Guy doesnt win a ring. However, after a inspirational speech by Curry, every NBA franchise in the history of the NBA gives its rings to Mr. Nice Guy. And Mr. Nice Guy's deformed friend (played by Rodney Stuckey) gets his starting postion back. The End.

4. The Sisterhood of the Traveling Marburys 2

Review- A must have. Also staring Isiah Thomas, Mike D'Antoni, MARC BERMAN and Jesus. The saga continues. Lies, sex and video tapes are all involved. Great movie to watch anywhere, especially in the front seat of a pick up truck. I rented out of the Red Box machine (If yall dont know about Red Box, figure it out!) and boy did i NOT feel like i wasted $1 for the 1 night i had it. I refuse to give away the story for this one. Just buy it. ( exclusively at Steve and Barry's AND Goodwill stores nationwide)

Thats all the Cat will pull out his Hat/Ass today. I had some pretty good Porno spoffs, but i figured everybody else would get pissed off if i posted them. Plus it would force Moose's parnets to give him 'that talk' or whatever Boston people call 'Sexual Edumacations'. And yes, i just did write this in 5 minutes and use Microsoft paint for the posters, then saved it on my computer for 2 weeks. If you think you could do better, stop thinking so damn hard.



This comment has been removed by the author.

alright i fixed it. And RV if i posted this too early i will delete it.

Eboy said...


Moose said...

It what force my parents to give me what talk? *sarcasm, don't worry*


how satisfied am i with this?

2.92929292929292999999999999967 Stars out of a possible 7

Roy said...

I love this post from Betcatz... Hilarious. :D

Kid Presto said...

nice one with the steve francis and mobley one.

Hursty said...

LOL, thats fucking funny dude.

Money Bill Williams said...

"before ending up like Gary Payton just dick ridding super stars to a ring and being a shadow of your former self."

I just spat christmas sausage all over the cricket on the tv with that one!

html hit counter
free website url submission