Saturday, January 17, 2009

Its Settled: The Verdict

So, a 'week' ago I said that I would come up with a slamonline all-star/dream team. That week has turned almost into a month. Apologies for the lateness.

From the comments I recieved this was (imo) the strongest line-up we could assemble for both teams. I took into account: experience, height, ability and geographical location in making these decisions (not really). for me, this was done in an exremely professional manner, taking almost 1 hour to look at all the comments and decided rostering.

1st Team:

PG- Money Bill Williams- Cos we aint got no point guard except him. Oh, and DP likes to come off the bench to kill second units. I do worry about having a 6'2 PG though. Especially from what I saw when we played.

SG-Izzo. For various reasons. 1)- He almost played for Ireland- in the alchohol Olympics- word! 2) Every team has a Allen Iverson try-hard. 3. Every team has a European in it nowadays- except Boston.

SF-Me! Cos I'm the author! And 3 is my natural position right now.

PF-Eboyyyy- because every roster always has an old person that looks funny. See, Celtics- Cassell, Rockets, Mutumbo. And because he almost played college ball.

C- Cub. Do we really have to discuss this?

6th Man: Justin Walsh. Walshy seems like a dude who can play 2 or 3 positions so versatility is important, especially coming off the bench.

2nd Team:

PG-RV - perimeter stopper. Solid with the ball. Enough said. And it takes 5 to win a ball game.

SG- DP- he loves to kill the 2nd unit. This team needed scoring and assists. Badly.

SF-B.Long- I don't think I could handle him gloating over being the shooting guard. Sheesh.

PF-BET- No-one else plays the 4, and besides, every team needs an Artest or Bowen on it. Even if it is just for kicks.

C-Tariq- Izzo says he's tall. And he adds International Flavour.

6th Man: Moose. Apart from his age, height and position, he's just so frickin' awesome that I couldn't resist giving him the insanely large responsibility as 12th man. In two years he'll be better than everyone, so you guys should watch out for lil' Moosie!

Utility: The Baconator. Why? Because he's a utility duh.

Head Coach:
Mr. Eboy. Sir!

Why? Because he was dumb enough to volunteer for the job of coaching a bunch of smart-ass pr*cks like us.

Assistant Coach:
Me. Because I coach a girls rep team that has won 64 straight games against girls who are all 2-3 years older than them. Oh, and I get to talk to coache's all the time working for the Spirit and at the Youth Olympics. And nothing could give me greater pleasure than to turture Eboy on the sidelines.

Statistician: Roy. If it weren't for injuries, he'd be starting for the 2nd team, with RV or DP coming off the bench as the 6th man for the 1st team.

Of course, I'm expecting some heated responses and even a death threat or 2. But I got this for you all 'And you know what they say- When you great, it's not murder- its assassinate'. Truth.
PS- It'd be great if you could read the game notes I wrote below. I get that because it's not about the USA, the majority of you immediately loose interest. I did put a lot of effort in though and just a 'thanks' would be awesome. Thanks guys. Besides, you might be 'witnessing' the birth of a future college or WNBA/NBA star.
Peace, Hursty.


Justin Walsh said...

I dig being 6th man. I'm lefty, versatile, a shooter, not the greatest defense which just screams 6th man. I endorse the move. In fact, I love the move. All I need is 25 minutes PT or so.

Justin Walsh said...

But on the real though, I'm bout to unleash a shitload of Justin Walsh highlights of my basketball skills, just to prove to facebook that I am the lefty Ben Gordon (not Manu, I am versatile but his defense is way ahead of mine, I prefer the Gordon comparison, he can't play D either hahah)

Hursty said...

So then we have at least 2 lefties on the team. Niiice. I'm more of a Manu type player than you are it seems... gotta play both ends of the court.
Manu's D isn't great, but its not bad either. And he can hit the 3 with ease. And we both used to have long hair. Best believe that I'm playing starters minutes though whatever the case.

Moose said...

12 man???????????? And thanks, Hursty. I edited my part to make it un-embarrassing.

RV said...

Did i mention I'm ambidextrous?

the baconator said...

Moose, at least you're not "Utility," whatever the hell that means. Hahahahaha, nice post

Hursty said...

Utility means that you can play multiple positions, but because other guys were 'better' than you and selected only 1 post, they got the starting nod. You come off the bench and can fill in 2 or 3 or even 4 positions. Utility baby.

RV- lol. I figured that everyone was ambidexterous to some degree. You should have said that hahaha.

BET said...

Eboy is guarding me? ANd he is coaching? His feeling WILL get hurt. Once he realizes he cant guard me, he will tell his coach (AKA make a mental note) to double team me. Then my partner in crime Tariq will take over. It will be like a Amar'e - Shaq effect.

jameyburke said...

You did your homework-Green haven't had any EuroTrash since Jiri Welsch. The only thing I disagree with is that Bowen and 96 are in the same category. Bowen is a defender who really gets in your head. Artest is an offender who as a baby was dropped on his head.

DP said...

yeah I can dig it homes. I'll be the main man on the second unit by just freakin cats all day with my baby smooth jumper. let me come off a screen. I dare you. I double dare you.

BETBET said...

If DP can throw an Alley this could turn dangerous....
Cub would be Greg Oden

Hursty said...

Cool. Sounds sick haha. I like that vid too BET. Now you and DP have to check the group email....please.

B. Long said...

The second team would run circles around the first unit.

Hursty said...

Yes B. Because you're on it lol.

Eboy said...

Hursty, we have THREE lefties, kid....sorry I was late to this. And please put me on Fall Out Bitch.....'cause that motherfucker would never touch the ball, let alone see it.

Eboy said...

Oh, and Hursty...I might coach half a season.....let you take over.... and then just when we get to the playoffs...I'll fuck around and take my spot watch how you approach me, kid. :)

Hursty said...

Lol Eboy. Didn't know you are/were a southpaw. You're talking about B.Long right? LOL.

Eboy said...

Yes, Hursty, B.

Roy said...

Statistician? Cool. I like the idea Hursty. Sorry, if I read this post just now. My Internet provider has been crazy these past few days. I've done some stats for about a couple years ago. I've been hampered with injuries. If I wasn't injured, I'd love to come off the bench and play. :D

Hursty said...

No worries Roy ;)

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